A new spring "do"

Cover Your Ears

I am so fed up with trying to potty train a reluctant, but perfectly capable child. It just makes me batty to be changing to diapers of two children, and today I am finding no Zen-like calm from the idea-- the reality-- that I will simply have to relax and wait until Audrey is ready. I AM READY. I have told Audrey that the store is all out of diapers, the washing machine is broken, and also that I am not going to change any more of her diapers, as of today, so she'll have to either use the potty or spend the rest of her life in the poopy diaper she is currently wearing.

Patience has never been my strong suit.

In a few hours I will calm down-- probably-- and change many more diapers for my toddler who is now so tall her legs literally hang off the end of the changing table. But right now I heartily resent it. Better to refrain from commenting on this post; I'm really just too riled up for sympathy or disagreements of any kind. I am kind of enjoying typing into the void all this pent up frustration.

Phew. Okay. I am better now. Back to the drawing-- I mean the changing-- board.

Overheard: Sweet Nothings

Audrey said today, "I want Daddy to come home. He's my sweet boy."

Audrey, your dad will melt when he hears that you said that about him, but if he hears you saying that about any other guy, he will start guarding our front door with a baseball bat. He's already freaking out about your first date. If you want to know the truth, he started worrying about your prom night on the day that we learned your gender in the 17-week ultrasound.

High-Five Hilarity

It looks a little bit like Audrey is trying to smack Calvin here, but rest assured, she's aiming for my hand. Not that she has never taken an experimental swing at her brother, or won't in the future, but it was all friendly this time. I love the sound of Calvin's laughter. And we didn't manage to get it into the video, but I also loved Audrey saying, "We laughing together, Mom! We laughing together!"

Calvin this morning, and some Easter photos, long overdue

Audrey and Scott are at the circus together this afternoon, and Calvin is in the backpack right now, leaving me with about three minutes to post. Easter Sunday we had an egg hunt through our little garden, and-- credit to my enterprising spouse-- Audrey even had a hand-decorated Easter basket from the craft store, complete with ribbons and everything.

Overheard this morning as Audrey and I walked through our neighborhood in the mild sunshine:

Audrey: Mom, it's nice to walk in the springtime.

Kris: I agree.

Audrey: My 'gree, too.

Can this be happening? Pinch me.

We had friends over this morning for a rollicking play-date, and Jennie brought ELMO CUPCAKES, a sight so beautiful it temporarily robbed Audrey of the power of speech. She recovered her senses, and so did her buddies Lena and Liam, and they ate up Elmo's red buttercream fur and rich chocolatey brain. DeLISH. Thank you, Jennie!

A Kitchen Still-Life

I have a really good explanation for this. I do.

It's just that we ran out of tissue for Audrey's perpetually runny nose, so that explains the toilet paper-- normal, right?-- but when I came across this little scene on the kitchen counter, I heard two different voices in my head reporting back on it. The first one said, calmly, "Oh, hey, maybe I ought to put the toilet paper roll somewhere else. That's not so appealing seeing it next to the cookware and the dish drainer." And the other voice said, "How long is my sentence here, and might I get some time off for good behavior?"

I'll just go put the dishes away now.

The Calvin Series. Vote for your fave, receive a free Skype call from the kids.

Yes, Jim and Shirley, I'm talking to you! Get your web-cam set-up. The other grandparents are Skyping and Audrey wants to know "when I talk to Mimi and Pop-Pop on the 'peter?"

How can you resist this adorable request another minute? Open up that web-cam, throw out the instructions (my method) and get to work!

Runners up will receive used onesies, signed by Calvin.

Education of a Boston Driver

A preview of warm summer nights to come...

David Sedaris has a fine essay collection called "Dress Your Family in Denim and Corderoy." I think I'm going to call my book, "Sew Your Children Into Their Sleepwear." Calvin is still suffering from itchy, dry allergy-ravaged skin and wakes himself up by scratching, but he's really getting too big and dexterous for swaddling. Now, with the change of season I decided we'd better start weaning him off the familiar arms-pinned-to-sides mode of sleep. Besides, the guy can roll over now and he needs, as Audrey says, "a little space."

So this morning I found myself whip-stitching up the armholes of some summer-weight sleep sacks so that Calvin can move a bit but can't scratch at his face and scalp, keeping everyone awake all night. It wasn't very long ago that I was duct-taping Audrey into her diaper and putting her blanket sleepers on backwards to keep her in her diaper. None of which worked, FYI, but I got that busy and productive feeling that I often crave from all my extra worrying and internet searching. Thanks to the other parents I found on-line who suggested the armless sleep sacks. He's napping away in one of them as I post this!